The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
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