I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I think my vagina is haunted
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
How does one acquire holy water?
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
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