So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
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Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize