So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize