I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Randomize