Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
there is glitter all over my balls
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