Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize