we were pretty classy up until the second keg
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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