It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
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if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
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My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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