i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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