wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
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