He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
It's blow job season.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize