No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Randomize