the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Randomize