I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
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