He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Cover your peen. We're going out.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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