His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
So vagazzling was a success
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize