im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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