First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize