All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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