My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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