i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Randomize