Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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