That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
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