he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Randomize