then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
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