What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Blood and glitter go together right?
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
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