wake up i wanna do it froggy style
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
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