My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
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