my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize