the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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