Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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