Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
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