never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
dude. I can hear the air.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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