Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize