Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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