either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
My bed smells like the plague
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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