You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
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