We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Come see our sink grown plant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
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