Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize