I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
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