I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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