***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
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