i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
the day after is always just damage control
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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