Swine flu. Run for my life!
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
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coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
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Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
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