Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
well you can't waste a boner
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize