I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
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