had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
i need some magic done to my vagina
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
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