i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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