Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
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